I overuse my agenda, I jot down every thought that passes my mind - so it does not indeed stay there and take more of my personal RAM.
I cut down the big projects at work and finish them bit by bit, along with following up on projects pending since after Tax season. I cleaned my office, and things sped up a little. Life somehow always starts to go faster and easier anytime I do actual physical cleaning. I have more cleaning to do at home, along with replacing some of work clothes. Last year I could rely on my European shopping, this year I barely could fit all the clothes we had in Slovenia. Many thanks to the Universe for the Zip-lock bags, an understanding attendant in Ljubljana airport who counted the overall weight for 3 suitcases and disregarded overweight in 2 of them, and also - for the intuition that held me off from buying clothes last week of May :).
I sleep for 5-6 hours a night, take a while to realize who I am and where I am and what day of the week it is although meanwhile I perfectly navigate myself around bedroom, bathroom and closet with my eyes half-open. I complete packing lunch bags for Chinchillas and start breakfast, and barely after 7 - wake them up and dress them and try to pull them to the kitchen and one of them performs a world drama every morning. While they are eating I finish throwing in food for the day for myself, and make coffee, and just do not have enough time to eat myself because there is never enough time for everything. But I can cheat the system, make myself a marmite-avocado toast and have it in the car, with coffee, after I drop off chinchillas to kindergarten and before I put on my makeup, still in the car. And maybe, once I get to work I can have a yoghurt or some leftovers of cottage cheese right from the plastic jar, or muesli that I poured milk into a couple of hours ago, still at home.
But neither having breakfast, lunch or snacks at work matter, because at this time of my life - it is really only fuel to keep myself going fast and do thing quickly and right the first time.
Because I am already angry with myself for not having completed Ethics exam by now, and I give myself time till next Tuesday.
Because I need more time for only all the auxiliary activities in my life - and that covers the life of other people in my household apart from my own health and recovery. Which means I will be constantly spreading my time thinly own gym and beauty rituals, my recovery and doctors' appointments, and keeping the house clean and the fridge full, with asking for advice on contractors for backyard projects and looking for replacement for bedroom ceiling light, and for taking Chinchillas to their doctors and dentists, doing activities with them, reading books and brushing teeth, and getting up at night to sick or thirsty kid, if needed.
Because I have more interests and more ideas coming to my mind than I can handle and manage and plan. And I already have not only a dozen goals for this year pending in my agenda, but also already have the next page completely covered with ideas and plans I find essential to take on next.
And in a few more years I will be looking back at my life now with all kicks and clenched teeth in attempts not to let go of anything important and not to pivot from what I think will matter most for me - and I'll be thinking...
... I don't know what I will be thinking :) After all, I will be a different person in 5 years, just as I could not have imagined my strength and potential 5 years ago...
Actually, I do know what I will definitely think, no matter the circumstances: why did it take me so long? Why did I not move faster at the same time doing more every day for what's most important to me? Why did I not do everything possible, and then - impossible to get to all vital change in life quicker?
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