And every line of every date's space is filled; does not matter if I break down appointments and tasks by timeframes, or group them into blocks. Usually both :)
Today, closer to afternoon, a feeling of helplessness stoke me again. My agenda's been filled with stuff to do for weeks now, and for every item I cross off, two new are to be added to the list. And what's worse - none of the items that I do not consider routine did not yield any significant results or life improvements in the past few months! Keep reminding myself that many important things just take time to happen. But then I glance at the achievers that I used to look up to - and it seems that they all are shaping their lives exactly the way they want them to be and not breaking a sweat, while I'm pretty much running around in circles. It's mid-March and none of my 20 goals for the year is close to completion. Even the reading goal is at 7% - what a joke...
And then having thought all this over, I suddenly got another strong feeling arising: "Enough!".
I could live this life for months, and nothing would change, but...
Enough!
In the next several hours I cleaned up the whole house and did the laundry, ordered the course free trial, put old stuff for sale on Craigslist, sent the Baby Shower invites and started planning the menu and decor, after some totally fruitless research on Glion's website - emailed the university and requested transcripts, cancelled the old credit cards with the clothes stores, cooked dinner and went through the pile of mail pinned to the kitchen bulletin board, and worked out some other unfinished business.
Felt stronger.
With some order around and within, it's time to think over a strategy to better leverage all the time, knowledge and energy I have. The way things used to work do not seem to fit my life goals anymore :)
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